3 shots and 3 doubles later, I’m on the Central Line with drunk people at 2:40am. I feel like I must be the only sober person on here but that can’t be right, especially when I’m sitting here smiling like a Cheshire Cat thinking about my final destination. Definitely a mixture of alcohol and excitement!
I start an internal dialogue; Sometimes you have to make sacrifices to get your end away. And by sacrifice, I mean travelling further than 30 minutes to get your leg over.
Girls have needs. No slags or derogatory terms here. #Samantha
What got me here, in this state of intoxication, was meeting up with a friend and beelining to Freedom in Soho.
Actually, we didn’t go straight there, we thought we’d check out “The Box”. Walked past the queue and darling, there was nothing about my outfit nor my state of mind that would even let me in. Every lady in heels, me in platform Supergas..I doubt that counts. Tight ass jeans vs. my Super comfy pants (easy for sliding off 😉). My make up wasn’t on fleek either and my hoops were big enough to have a chihuahua jump through!
So we decided to spend the night in a “gay” bar drinking and people watching. There was alcohol, a couple of stripper poles and packed full of straight couples and beyond cringey Hen Dos.
I wish I could write more, but the smell of body odour on this 20+ degree train and the swish swish of the alcohol in my belly means I could definitely projectile vomit on this chick in her red dress.
Note to all; It is important to wear clothing that allows you to breathe. Everyone will appreciate it. They may not thank you for it, but I can assure you it means they won’t dedicate any blog/Snapchat/instagram/gossip time dedicated to talking about you.
^ So the above was me drunk at 2:30am and making my way to East London.
The below is me having recovered from last night and having reflected on the last 48 hours.
Today involved snuggles, an AddisonLee driver deciding to talk to me, throwing up, sleeping and takeaways.
At what point do you stop being a #Samantha and get the opportunity to be a #Charlotte. How do I get my bald little Jewish man?
I end the evening on a Love Island high…and drafting my next post..